What I do want to share is what I said at the end of the video, which was just as I was talking - the clearest example of my situation:
"But in any event I'm not complaining so much, as I'm tired of saying "Oh well, I'm fine" as I'm crumpling in a corner. And people look at you like you're complaining or you're trying to get attention. Because you're in pain all the time, and its not that, its just... You have to talk about it, if you're not talking about it uh it it wears you down and you get depressed. So you got to be vocal about the fact that you uh feel like you're dying all the time, even though you're not dying. And I'm twenty five, and I live in my mother's basement. And I can't move, and I can't go to school, and I'm waiting on disability - and I mean what what else can I do? What else do I have to do? I can't... I can't work with my hands much any more, I can barely read books, I can barely write and I used to write all the time, and I can't write - and I can't draw... and and like what the hell... am I supposed to do?
What am I supposed to do? So I just do this. I just exist. It's all I've got left. So umm that's it. This is almost ten minutes and I'm going to stop this, and I'll upload it later."
I have my old Russian pocket watch on my lap, a Moinja which has served me through all of Saint John's and many other adventures of life, college, cross country treks, all sorts of things, this watch has traveled as my time piece. Its ugly and its loud, and its battered, but oh what a watch it is for $50 I got an 18 jewel mechanical movement that will keep time until I am an old old man.
You may remember we are planning to move. We found a decent duplex for sale, local, god knows if it will still be for sale later on, but here's the size comparison between the two:
That's from the top (obviously) so we would be cutting down on heating a bit. Mom would have one half of the house and I would have the other. I believe there are fireplaces for both sides which is nice - I love fires. I can't wait to have an apartment again, a place all my own - even if it is not really "mine" as in earned and paid for by myself - it is still, well it is still my own.
Then there is the Norton Enfield project which I wrote about, I showed a mock up of it here:
Well it is on its way:
Those are of course the wrong cases, but what can I say about that? I have the new ones in a box thats wrapped under the Christmas tree so not until the 25th will I know just what is going on in that department. Meaning - I won't know if I can use the gearbox I want to use with the primary cases I have - or if I will have to buy a Enfield gearbox and put together a full Enfield engine in the Norton chassis. But at LEAST there is progress!!!!!
This last picture is a gift of a dear dear friend of mine who has given me his old motorcycle:
A Yamaha XS400 - which makes 45HP if running right, SOMETHING to be said about that! It needs a few things, but that's not a bad deal! I'm going to sell the GS550 as a parts bike and give my friend half of what ever I get for it.
Anyways, more later.
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